Baltimore OUTloud | Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender Community News Maryland

As if, that isn't enough, you have the families to deal with. If it's new enough that you don't have to spend it together with your respective clans, then you dodge the bullet...for this year anyway. However, if you've been together long enough that you're expected to attend the family gathering, the stress meter can easily go off the chart. It can be especially difficult if you don't know the potential future in-laws that well. Every family has different traditions as well, which can add to the sense of "other" and alienation.

Again, the key is to just relax and enjoy yourself. Look at it as a way of getting to know your significant other better. There's nothing like seeing someone interact with his or her family to really get to know the real him or her. Or just think of yourself as an intrepid explorer studying the bizarre rituals of a primitive culture. Whichever gets you through. Oh, and avoid excessive alcohol intake at family functions. One glass of wine might relax you a bit. Several will result in an embarrassing story that might be funny one day, but definitely not this year.

So you've been together so long you've forgotten what it's like to be single. That doesn't mean all the holiday-related stress is gone. Now you have to decide things like with which family you're going to spend which holiday, assuming your family accepts your relationship that is. If not, going separate ways at holidays can be stressful in and of itself, especially when the idea that we should be together with our loved ones on holidays has been so ingrained in us. Now you're being forced to choose between your family and your partner.

If that's the case, decide together what's more important for you as a couple. Do you want to be with each other or is it more important to be with your extended family? If you decide you want to be together, you can always spend time with your family after the actual day. Set boundaries and ask your family to respect them. If they can't, then maybe it's time to cut some ties, as painful as that can be. Often, when families realize how important your significant other really is, they'll become more understanding and accepting.

If you're fortunate enough to have two accepting families already, then you can always split the day if you're close enough to both of them, or alternate years.

Of course, there's still the added pressure of getting the right gifts. Again, deciding on a prearranged spending limit can help alleviate much of that stress, but most importantly, remember that it's the thought that really counts, not the price tag.

To sum up, don't allow the stress of the holidays to hinder your enjoyment, whether single, a new couple, or in a long-term relationship. Take steps to make them as special and fun-filled as possible. And above all, have a safe and happy holiday season with those you love.

Until next time...Happy Dating!